Sexy shopping guides abound during the holiday season, but few of them take chronic pain into consideration. If you’re a regular Rebellious reader, you are probably aware that we feel passionately about the conversation surrounding pelvic pain and painful sex. That’s why we’ve teamed up with MedAmour to offer a holiday shopping guide that keeps folks with pelvic pain in mind!
MedAmour is an independent, women-owned company offering “solutions for intimate wellness.” They are also passionate about sexual health and its importance in our overall quality of life. MedAmour provides information from sexperts, doctors, and physical therapists about chronic pain, sexual wellness, and sex-positive solutions, and they also have an online store with a specialty boutique selection of pleasure products.
Below is a list of items from their shop that can make great holiday gifts for yourself or someone special. Read to the end to find out about the product I didn’t expect to work but is now a must-have in my toy bag!
With its air pressure technology that creates a sucking sensation when placed over the clitoris, Womanizer has two new models—the Womanizer Classic and Womanizer Premium. They are very similar, but while the Classic only has eight power levels, the Premium has 12 power levels and two other settings called Smart Silence and Autopilot.
When Smart Silence is engaged, the Premium will remain silent (as though it is turned off) until it is placed against the skin. The Autopilot is a setting that will randomly scroll through power levels 1-4, 1-8, or 1-12, depending on your preference.
At $205, the Womanizer Premium is indeed a premium sex toy with a luxury price tag. The Womanizer Classic is $135, but I’d recommend the Premium for folks with pelvic pain who need a wider range of power levels. Lower settings are a requirement for me, personally. The Smart Silence and Autopilot settings are nice bonuses, but if the Classic just had a few extra power levels, I’d have been perfectly content with the more budget-friendly option.
This is a set of five medical-grade silicone dilators of graduated sizes, the smallest of which is slimmer than my index finger, the largest about the size of an average erect penis. This set from Sinclair Select is colorful and silky smooth. Reasonably priced and completely body-safe (sterilize them in a pot of boiling water for deep cleaning!), they add a bit of fun to the sometimes uncomfortable process of dilation therapy. The sizes graduate slowly enough that moving up through them—especially after you’ve been dilating for awhile—seems like a breeze. The smallest is un-intimidating enough for someone just starting dilation and the largest will prepare the body for deeper penetration.
This gift idea to aid in strap-on sex is one that can be used by just about anyone! Spareparts makes some of the most comfortable and durable harnesses on the market these days. (The underwear-style ones are a little less durable than the jock strap-style ones, but are great if you prefer them to the jock strap aesthetic.)
For folks with vulvas who want the ability to penetrate their partners, a wider selection of harnesses are available. But for people with penises who may have difficultly achieving and/or holding an erection, for example, Spareparts’ Deuce Harness is the best harness available for folks with genitals on the outside of their body. It has two holes—the higher one is meant for a dildo and the lower one is meant for an erect or non-erect penis. (Penises can also be completely tucked into a pocket inside the harness.) Use just a dildo, use just your penis, use one and then the other or use both for double penetration! Also great if you have a partner with pelvic pain who needs insertables smaller than a penis—strap-on a small dildo and you’re good to go. Spareparts’ harnesses are made with high quality fabric and such thoughtfulness that there’s a hidden pocket in the genital area to tuck a vibrating bullet into, too! So versatile!
The mini vibrators from this company are perfect for gift giving. One is a small, rechargeable heart-shaped vibe that comes in its own gift box, and the other is a battery-operated mini vibe that comes in its own zippered case. There are a range of colors and cases to choose from and some of them come with their own heart-shaped padlock.
A little too gentle for me, these vibes are great for folks who need really soft stimulation (because I know you exist and I think you are forgotten too often!). The Heart is the stronger of the two, though, because it is rechargeable. The Classique is so soft it kind of tickles me, but maybe that’s your thing. Both of these toys are covered in soft silicone, and are splashproof.
Vibrators and dildos are great for sexy times, but what about those little extra things that sometimes get forgotten? MedAmour has a great selection of “sextras,” including games, books, and lubes!
There are games for everyone, whether you’re looking for something tame and sexy or a little more adventurous. I’ve been using Affirmators for Love and Relationships ($13), their deck of “inspirational-but-not-cheesy affirmation cards focusing on love of all stripes.”
One of my favorite intimacy products is lubricant, which everyone can benefit from, but is especially important if you experience pelvic pain. Silicone lube is frequently recommended for pelvic pain patients and folks who have very sensitive vaginas because it is so slippery, but also because the body doesn’t absorb silicone so it lasts longer and is less likely to cause any sort of negative reaction. MedAmour carries Migliori (from $20), a thicker silicone lube that comes in a beautiful glass bottle and is manufactured here in Chicago, as well as one of my favorite brands of water-based lube, Sliquid.
But my crowning glory of this list is the lube that has permanently made it into TOUCH, my lube warmer: Bella CBD Aqua d’Amore lubricant (from $12). The idea is that CBD (the part of cannabis that is legal nationwide), is anti-inflammatory and encourages blood flow. I am not exaggerating when I say that Bella has made penetration not just more comfortable for me, but more pleasurable. Really! I was a huge CBD lube-skeptic because there isn’t much research on CBD and it seems like people are putting it in everything and calling it holistic wellness. Bella is a small, women-owned, U.S.-based company that has a wide range of CBD products. I actually use Bella lube with my silicone dilators because it takes about 20 minutes to start feeling the (non-psychoactive) effects, so by the time I’m done dilating, I’m ready to move on to more exciting things. I can tell that it’s working when I insert a toy and it feels as good as it did before I ever experienced pelvic pain. I’d call that a win!!
This shopping guide focuses mostly on folks with vulvas who have pelvic pain, but MedAmour also carries products that support the sexual and pelvic health of people with penises (who, Rebellious would like to note, aren’t always men)!